TV

Kid Rivalry: Nickelodeon Vs. Disney Channel

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There are rivalries between Batman and the Joker, James Bond and Blofeld, and countless others. One notable rivalry is between networks the Disney Channel and Nickelodeon, the networks responsible for some of the famous shows your tweens are crazy about. I have a review of each network and some of their shhows.

Disney Channel

The Suite Life of Zack & Cody
The show, which is about twins who live in a hotel, is funny enough, using slapstick as a key formula in the series. Dylan and Cole Sprouse (Cole played Ross’s son on Friends) play Zack and Cody, respectively, who get into all sorts of shenanigans. Dylan is very swift and quick as a prankster who often falls by the wayside. It seems to come naturally, while Cole’s geek Cody seems to be a tired formula. He tries way too hard to be nerdy. The real stars are the self absorbed rich London (Brenda Song) and Maddie (Ashley Tisdale). The two battle it out in every episode which earns the show’s most laughs. Though, the self referential jokes are tiring, mentioning Disney’s sleeper success High School Musicaland pretending that Maddie looks nothing like Ashley Tisdale, who co-starred in High School Musical

Grade: B+

Hannah Montana
The show Hannah Montana chronicles the life of a pop superstar living each day as an ordinary tween and each night partying away at concerts. I’ve heard it all before. It’s much like superheroeslike Batman, Spider-Man, and Superman, all of whom lead separate, normal lives in the real world. Miley Cyrus is peachy as Miley Stewart, and Cyrus’s real father, Billy Ray, plays her on-screen father. The family colloquials get tiring after 5 times in one episode. The “Sweet Niblets!” are really annoying after a while. It is a question whether Ms. Cyrus has a good voice? Some may concur, while others may say she has an effect that most won’t remember in coming years. I don’t think it’s all that.
Grade: B-

Nickelodeon
Spongebob Squarepants
Spongebob Squarepants is a cute, peppy little guy who goes to work at the Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty, run by the greediest man since…well you think about that for a little bit. Even though parents may find the potty humor immature, it’s probably the funniest, most well written, and smartest kid show in a long time. With many a laugh for the ones who get the humor, and a few giggles for the youg’ens, Spongebob is the show to go to when all else on television is impure and scadalous.
Grade: A

Drake & Josh
It’s definitely not the smartest show on TV, but it’s okay. I’m talkin about Drake & Josh, the show about a slacker and a nerd who become brothers. Haven’t we heard this before. The show is aimed at teens. It’s repetitive with bad sets and odd jokes.
Grade: C+

So you’ve just had a small taste of the networks. Who’s better: Nick. Even though some shows are totally brainless, the little yellow sponge takes it home for the team.

Nick: B+
Disney: B

And the Winners Are…: The Golden Globe Winners

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Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture
Cate Blanchett, I’m Not There

Best Supporting TV Actor
Jeremy Piven, Entourage

Best Actress in a TV Drama Series
Glenn Close, Damages

Best Supporting TV Actress
Samantha Morton, Longford

Best Actor in a TV Drama Series
Jon Hamm, Mad Men

Best Animated Feature
Ratatouille

Best Actress in a Motion Picture Comedy or Musical
Marion Cotilliard, La Vie en Rose

Best Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture
Javier Bardem, No Country for Old Men

Best Actress in a Mini Series or TV Movie
Queen Latifah, Life Support

Best Actor in a TV Comedy
David Duchovny, Californication

Best Comedy Series
Extras

Best Actress in a TV Comedy Series
Tina Fey, 30 Rock

Best Director
Julian Schnabel, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly

Best Actor in a Comedy or Musical Motion Picture
Johnny Depp, Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Best Motion Picture Comedy or Musical
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Best TV Drama Series
Mad Men

Best Actress in a Motion Picture Drama
Julie Christie, Away From Her

Best Actor in a Motion Picture Drama
Daniel Day-Lewis, There Will Be Blood

Best Motion Picture Drama
Atonement

There are the winners for the 65th Golden Globe Awards.

Weird (and Annoying) Science: Review for New Fall Show: The Big Bang Theory

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For a lot of people, watching quality programming that is also chock full of smart subjects and anecdotes is often entertaining (like Fraiser), but those of who are math geeks and those of who are expecting a great comedy from The Big Bang Theory, they will be sorely disappointed. The two main characters are absolute geeks, not even mentioning easy things like E=mc2, they mention things far beyond and a little irrelevant (“Did you know that if a stair is even 2mm off that most people will trip?” says Sheldon, played by Jim Parsons). Two geeks, Sheldon and afore mentioned Leonard (Johnny Gelecki), get a kinetic shock when a blond “beauty” moves in across the hall. Then “evolves” a relationship between desperate Sheldon and bimbo Penny (Kaley Couco); relationship meaning Sheldon will do ANYTHING for her and stares at her. Considering she works at the Cheesecake Factory, this relationship sounds unbelievably cliche. The fact of the matter is that you don’t need to know the difference between 3x (-4ab + y) and 3+5 in order to get the jokes. Worst part is that there’s a laugh track. The hype of the show makes it look like the jokes are cunning, snarky and very geeky (kinda like the jokes that make The Office‘s Dwight so funny), but the jokes always fall flat (not by means of gravity). The jokes very rarely have anything to do with being sophisticated and scientific, no inside jokes. They are mostly picking at Beauty and the Geek romances. A few of the jokes are mildly enjoyable and Leonard plays a very good sidekick/pal who often enjoys giving random anecdotes. In a nut shell: you don’t have to be smart to watch this show, it’s important that you enjoy dumb jokes. Grade: C
Stars: 2.5/5
Stars: 5.5/10

Purr-fectly "Horror"-fying: Review for "Masters of Horror: The Black Cat"

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The Black Cat is one of the episodes in the Showtime series Masters of Horror. It appears in season 2. The film is beautifully crafted by Stuart Gordon, director of the classic Re-Animator. The film does not feature any gratuatisque scenes, like most of the other episodes in the series. It does feature blood, but with good reason to the storyline: Virginia Poe is suffering from TB. The film is based on Edgar Allan Poe’s tale of self destruction. It is about a man who is mentally tormented by this black cat, and in result, does unspeakable acts. The film plays out fantastically, pretending that Poe, very poor and depressed because of his wife’s disease, is slowly descending into madness. The accounts in the film are either something that happened in Poe’s life or taken directly from the short story. The thing I liked about it is that the film didn’t feature unneeded amount of blood or nudity, that all the elements were important to the story and not just thrown it for fun. Gordon did a great job with Re-Animator, so it was interesting to see a splatter director take on a piece of classic Gothic literature, much like he did in the first season of Masters with H.P. Lovecraft’s Dreams of the Witch House, which (no pun intended) was almost as well done as this one. The picture is almost black and white for the time setting except for scenes in which you see blood or anything truly colorful. This is the best one of the series. Poe is the Master of Gothic Horror, while Gordon remains the Master of Cinematic Horror. Grade: A- Stars: 4.5/5 Stars 8.5/10