If I Had My Way: 2016 Awards

Posted on Updated on

eden

I’m also reminded of the time I was once invited to play fantasy football. It was with some friends, including Kevin Ketchum and Bryan King, and someone had tweeted that it was going to be “film critics vs film fans”. In my naiveté, I thought that suggested that we would be picking actual film critics and film people to play football against one another. I was imagining Richard Roeper and Peter Travers being pummeled and thinking it would be “warm and likeable” to experience. Signing up to begin playing was kind of how I imagine the shoot for The Revenant to be, if I am to believe the press tour. Arduous, stressful, dirty, and bloody. (I gave myself a papercut.) But, in the spirit of making fantasy picks for things that are as foreign to me as heterosexuality, and also an awards show I just suffered through, here are my ideal picks for awards things.

MistresSCover

Best Picture

45 Years
Mistress America
Carol
Tangerine
Clouds of Sils Maria
Kumiko, The Treasure Hunter
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Lobster
Paddington
Eden

mr holmes

Best Actor

Peter Sarsgard, Experimenter
Tom Courtenay, 45 Years
Henry Cavill, The Man from UNCLE
Josh Lucas/Stephen Plunkett, The Mend
Ian McKellan, Mr. Holmes

kumiko-the-treasure-hunter

Best Actress

Mya Taylor/Kiki Rodriguez, Tangerine
Greta Gerwig/Lola Kirke, Mistress America
Charlotte Rampling, 45 Years
Rinko Kikuchi, Kumiko, The Treasure Hunter
Teyonnah Paris, Chi-raq
Cate Blanchett/Rooney Mara, Carol
Anne Dorval/Suzanne Clement, Mommy
Saoirse Ronan, Brooklyn

065-vlc 2014-11-13 00-10-09-87

Best Supporting Actor

Live Schreiber, Spotlight
Ben Whishaw, The Lobster
Pierre-Yves Cardinal, Tom at the Farm
Oscar Isaac, Ex Machina
Joel Edgerton, The Gift

SIls Maria 1

Best Supporting Actress

Phyllis Smith, Inside Out
Sarah Paulson, Carol
Alicia Vikander, Ex Machina
Kristen Stewart, Clouds of Sils Maria
Colbie Smolders, Results

lobster-620x400

Best Ensemble

Mistress America
Tangerine
Welcome to Me
Paddington
The Lobster

Angelina-Jolie_article_story_large

Best Director

Todd Haynes, Carol
Sean Baker, Tangerine
Noah Baumbach, Mistress America
Celina Sciamma, Girlhood
Angelina Jolie Pitt, By the Sea
Stephen Cone, Henry Ganble’s Birthday Party
George Miller, Mad Max: Fury Road
Rihanna, Bitch Better Have My Money
Andrew Haigh, 45 Years

IMG_1849

Best Adapted Screenplay

Carol
45 Years
Mr. Holmes
Kumiko, The Treasure Hunter
Paddington

Ex-Machina-Gallery-02

Best Original Screenplay

The Mend
Girlhood
Ex Machina
Mistress America
Appropriate Behavior

unfriended

Best Animated Film

Inside Out
Shaun the Sheep Movie
Unfriended

Liz-Corfixen-My-Life-Directed-by-Nicolas-Winding-Refn-review

Best Documentary Film

My Life Directed by Nicolas Winding Refn
The Hunting Ground
What Happened, Miss Simone?
Do I Sound Gay?
The Search for General Tso

phoenix

Best Foreign Film

Girlhood
Phoenix
Eden
Tom at the Farm
Mustang

carol-film

Best Music

Carol
45 Years
The Man from UNCLE
Tom at the Farm
Mad Max: Fury Road

Lost_River_review_-_CANNES

Best Cinematography

Carol
45 Years
Spectre
Lost River
Saint Laurent

the force awakens

Best Visual Effects

Unfriended
Mad Max: Fury Road
Lost River
The Man from UNCLE
Star Wars: The Force Awakens

mad max fury road

Best Sound Design

Mad Max: Fury Road
Paddington
The Man from UNCLE
Unfriended
Goodnight Mommy

the big short

Best Editing

45 Years
Carol
The Man from UNCLE
Mistress America
The Big Short

brooklyn

Best Costume Design

Carol
Brooklyn
Mommy
Mustang
Paddington

queen-of-earth-cropped

Best Makeup

Crimson Peak
The Man from UNCLE
Mr. Holmes
Clouds of Sils Maria
Queen of Earth

landscape-1442435302-pgl2kn-anomalisa-02-o2-8703151-1438094870

Best Production Design

Carol
Brooklyn
Anomalisa
Spectre
Crimson Peak

 

Advertisements

One thought on “If I Had My Way: 2016 Awards

    My Fantasy Awards Booking 2016 – Callum Petch said:
    February 7, 2016 at 8:01 am

    […] just before the Oscars revealed their nominations slate for the year, my good Internet friend Kyle Turner went ahead and published his own little fantasy list of what he would have filled the awards categories with had anybody with authority bothered to ask […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s